Imaginary Guns and Real Bullets

By | | , , ,
Comments Off on Imaginary Guns and Real Bullets
Robert Phillips

lennonI’m pressed up against a wall, waiting.  Hunting.  The gun I’m holding is inches from my nose, my two hands folded as if I’m praying.  My enemy, James Lyons, is around the corner, and I’m about to spring as soon as he comes into view.  I’m secret agent John Lennon, and besides making the greatest music ever, I also work for the government, saving the world.  Yesterday, I was Captain Kirk.  I’m 12 years old at 6th grade recess, the gun is imaginary, but I did actually save the world.  (Things are still going on, right?  You’re welcome.) 

Let me tell … Read More… →

Too-Tidy? Breaking Bad’s 94%-Pure, True-Blue Conclusion

By | | ,
Comments Off on Too-Tidy? Breaking Bad’s 94%-Pure, True-Blue Conclusion
Kevin Walsh

HuffPost_Shared

The reviews were in last Monday for the finale of Breaking Bad and some cried:  “It’s too tidy.  It’s too neat.  The rest of the show wasn’t like this.” 

It was the polar opposite of the terrible “But-They-Were-All-Dead-All-Along” finale of Lost.  It had no irritating fade to black with Tony’s knowing smile as he sees his daughter or a hit-man in The Sopranos. 

Sure, Walter White didn’t wake up beside Suzanne Pleshette like the end of The Newhart Show, but the ending of Breaking Bad was completely satisfying because it was so neat–as precise as Walt’s nearly pure blue meth.

Marty Robbins’ classic … Read More… →

Post-Season Tigers: Ethical Crossroad for Detroit Fans (Moral-less)

By | | ,
4 Comments
Kevin Walsh

HuffPost_Shared

Tonight the Tigers give it another try.  Under Jim Leland, they’ve been to the post-season many times and twice been to the World Series–crushed by the Cardinals in ’06 and crushed by the Giants last year.  It’s a battle of the big-dough, Little Caesar’s fortune against Billy Bean’s rummage-sale sabremetrics (although he’s never publicly endorsed the scheme).

Poor Mike Ilitch (a phrase not heard often), born just four months before the stock market crash, has had to endure plenty of Great Depressions.  He transformed the 1970’s Red Wings from a group outdrawn at Joe Louis Arena by the Ice Capades into the Yankees … Read More… →

Autumn Falls in South Florida

By | | , , ,
1 Comment
Robert Phillips

Autumn…the year’s last, loveliest smile...William Cullen Bryant.

I love seasons…that’s why I live in a place that skips the @#%ty ones…Daniel Tosh

Fall2

Autumn fell on us on a Sunday this year.  As I type this, it’s a brisk, autumny 85 degrees in downtown Miami. There will be a hard rainfall later today from about 5:45 until 6:05, depending on what time I get on I-95 to go home.  The rainy season will most likely be over sometime this month  It’s football season, and after the Sunday game, kids spill out of their houses to play outside in their favorite team T-shirts … Read More… →

Little League Purgatory: Nostalgia is 20-20 and Cornfields Line All Outfields

By | | , ,
Comments Off on Little League Purgatory: Nostalgia is 20-20 and Cornfields Line All Outfields
Kevin Walsh

It might have been a Hallmark Channel’s special–everyone was completely bathed in sunset gold; there was even corn behind the outfield.  But hidden in this pastoral setting lies the fine print for parents–the eleventh commandment of my nephew’s little league game.

  • “If a new inning doth start ere 8:30 PM, the game must continue until both sides have batted completely.”

Coach-pitch is that bastard child, somewhere between tee-ball and concussion–when dads (mainly) publicly humiliate themselves by missing the plate repeatedly–at least that was the way it was way back when my kids played.

Now, after too many trips to the chiropractor or too many threatened lawsuits, some clever dude invented a gadget that throws a perfect pitch each time.

But the … Read More… →

Gorillas & Government Shutdown: What Would George Bailey Do?

By | | , , ,
4 Comments
Kevin Walsh

HuffPost_Shared

[Updated after the September 30th shut-down.]

Last night’s vain countdown to midnight with no expectations for our leaders to avoid a government shutdown seems to be creating a sense of normalcy with these panics–making the bank-scare of George Bailey’s savings and loan look like over-reaction. We’re pretty used to these games of chicken, unfortunately.
gorilla

There’s the old joke asking where a gorilla sleeps.  The punchline of “Anywhere it wants” always made me chuckle.  It creates a visual of a Warner Brothers gorilla bending … Read More… →

The Fading Power of Handwriting: My Dad and Journaling in Northern Michigan

By | | , , , , ,
11 Comments
Kevin Walsh

HuffPost_Shared

D-Day was just three months away, but my dad’s Uncle Walt was instead worrying about the folks back home, specifically his sister Laura and her husband.

I didn’t know my grandparents had a rocky marriage, or that they were even separated, until I’d read this folded letter in my grandma’s shoebox.

Sixty years later,  I attended the funeral of Walt and Laura’s youngest brother Jerry in Florida, I had a chance to give the letter to Walt’s children, whom I had never met.   Walt had died thirty-four years earlier and they had never seen their father’s handwriting from a young hand–smooth, and confident.  … Read More… →

A Love Letter to Video Games or…Consoling Generations that Missed Out on an Entire Art Form

By | |
Comments Off on A Love Letter to Video Games or…Consoling Generations that Missed Out on an Entire Art Form
Kale

If you’re reading this blog post, and you’re were born before 1980, chances are you won’t really understand any of it. I mean, well, wait—look, I’m not trying to be ageist. I hate that. I get ageism all of the time. 

Back in ’06, I went to go see Steely Dan at DTE with a friend of mine. We were 15 or 16, I don’t remember; we were young enough to be the youngest people there by choice. After sitting down, an older gentleman behind us tapped on my shoulder and said, “Do you guys even know who Steely Dan is!?” His friends and him began to laugh. We just rolled our eyes. What was funny was when we knew the lyrics to every song … Read More… →

5 Great Horror Movies You’ve Never Heard Of – Mungo Scared!

By | | , ,
Comments Off on 5 Great Horror Movies You’ve Never Heard Of – Mungo Scared!
Robert Phillips

lake-mungo

It’s that time of year. Halloween is just around the cor—well, down the hall a bit. It’s time to connect with the true spirit of the holiday, which like all holidays, has been corrupted by outside influences…like Christmas was before people muddied it with a religious message. Halloween is not about costume parties and candy; it’s about turning off your lights, putting in a movie and having the wits scared out of you.

Horror movies as a genre can be frustrating. Edgar Allen Poe was able to combine the dark, nightmarish ideas of comic books with high art. This … Read More… →

The Anatomy of a Great ’80s Pop Rock Song

By | | ,
1 Comment
Kale

There’s a reason no one in music makes songs like the pop rock ballads of the 80’s anymore. It’s not because that kind of organized noise is out of style or because it’s difficult to recreate the sound of obsolete synthesizers and early ’80s, electric Yamaha drums, but because I don’t believe there is anyone in the pop music world right now with the vision, skills or intellectual wherewithal to come up with the classics that were bred from the likes of Toto, Journey, Styx, Foreigner, et cetera. 

What makes those ’80s rock songs so great though? Sometimes, it’s hard to pinpoint. Fear not, though, because Kale is here to give you the breakdown on what makes these  ’80s pop rock songs so perfect. To … Read More… →

Thanking Two Men I’d Forgotten to Thank 30 Years Ago: Mr. Denstaedt and Mr. Wentz

By | | , , , ,
19 Comments
Kevin Walsh

HuffPost_Shared

After attending 25 years of high school graduation ceremonies, it finally dawned on me as I sat in my robe and was thanked by grateful students and their parents–I really didn’t deserve such nice seats.

Compared, to the folks who were really responsible for the pomp and circumstance, my hourly contribution was minimal.  Elementary teachers put in the long hours and are stuck with the kids all day long.  Middle school teachers are fighting the two-headed dragon of hormones and immaturity in a short, nasty body that hasn’t often developed a soul yet.

Within two days, Clawson lost two of its icons–John Denstaedt and Bill … Read More… →

Jimmy Kimmel’s Flaming Yoga Pants or Syria: What Climbs Your Firewall?

By | | , , ,
Comments Off on Jimmy Kimmel’s Flaming Yoga Pants or Syria: What Climbs Your Firewall?
Kevin Walsh

Thanks to my teenage son and a gaming site, I spent five hours last Saturday removing a virus from our computer.  “Conduit,” was a crazy search-engine device that refused to leave, breezing past my security software.  The kid had let the intruder in disguised as an update of Adobe Flash that was “required” on my computer.

A good friend was startled to see a scary warning of a virus on his computer–so he clicked the large red “Remove Virus” button and thus began infecting his hard drive.

With “tears in my eyes” and begging for money from a US Embassy in London,  a modern Odysseus, disguised as me, wrote to hundreds of my contacts.  Most didn’t fall for the scam but a few did write … Read More… →

Yom Kippur: Judaism’s All-Star Break

By | | , ,
Comments Off on Yom Kippur: Judaism’s All-Star Break
Kale

I don’t really consider myself a very religious person, but I do celebrate the Jewish holidays and participate as much as I can because, while I may not be religious, I frequently find myself digging spiritual concepts and spiritual philosophy, and I use Judaism, sports, film and music as avenues to tap into that vague spirituality. It could be The Muppets or Maimonides. Everything from “There is no spoon” to “Luminous beings are we” to “If I am not for myself, who will be for me?” Or, even baseball. 

That’s why I love Judaism. I find that—perhaps more than other religions—Judaism is celebrated and practiced in so many different ways, that there’s something for everyone. Especially given the religion’s history and what its people have been … Read More… →

Abilify’s Bathrobe: The Joe Camel of Anti-Depressants

By | | , ,
Comments Off on Abilify’s Bathrobe: The Joe Camel of Anti-Depressants
Kevin Walsh

BathrobeStalker

The first time I saw the Abilify ad, I thought Saturday Night Live’s monologue had just finished.  There was no way it was serious…

I am fortunate not to suffer from the crippling effects of depression, but when I saw this cartoon, I felt insulted for the millions who do.  It’s tough enough to have to admit that you’re at the mercy of this syndrome but to have a pharmaceutical company display its complexities with an animated bathrobe, like a possessed Linus’s blanket, is wrong.

Not only does it perpetuate the “loafer/just get out of the house” stereotype of depressed people remaining … Read More… →

5 Beatles Covers That Are Better Than the Original

By | |
1 Comment
Kale

This post is gonna offend people. 

But it shouldn’t. 

People are really sensitive about their media. People are especially sensitive about remakes, covers, books that are made into movies and special editions. For a lot of us, the first version of a song or a story we hear is THE version of that song or story, and anyone who tried to do it again, well, it’s just not as good. The word remake, especially in the cinematic universe, is often a four letter word. Especially these days, when we’ve got remakes of “Poltergeist” coming out. Why do we need to remake movies that are already so good? I mean, I’m with you people on that. We don’t need a remake of “All the President’s Men” … Read More… →

The Great American Ballpark Tour – Any Man’s Dream

By | | ,
2 Comments
Steve Mitzel

It all started four weeks ago as I watched it pour rain here in Connecticut and track the storms on the radar. I had a Friday night without the kids and desperately wanted to go to Yankee Stadium to see my Tigers take on the Yankees. It’s a trek down to the city, especially Friday rush hour. But some great tickets came through and I realized that I was on the brink of man greatness – four ballparks in four weeks! When I told some of my married friends they claimed that married men across America were building statues of me.
 

2:30 rolled around that Friday and I looked at my friend, Jason, at work and told him “you have 10 minutes to … Read More… →

Cyber Schools–What the FAQ? A Union Goon’s Tea Party Question Reveals New British Taxation (with Podcast)

By | | , , , ,
7 Comments
Kevin Walsh

HuffPost_Shared

Podcast of interview with Kevin about this post by Night Shift’s radio host, Tony Trupiano (WDFN Detroit, AM 1130).  (Begins at 1:40)

If Columbus explored as much as the Detroit Free Press, he’d have never left that dock in southern Spain.

In a  “Free Press-Release” yesterday by Lori Higgins, “Michigan Students to Have Many Options for Online Learning,” we learn of the many choices that Michigan students now have to their education via online learning following the passage of Senate Bill 619.  I had high hopes that I’d finally learn a little more about the companies that are running these schools … Read More… →

College Football is Back, and So Are the Memories

By | | ,
1 Comment
Kale

I didn’t choose to go to Michigan State University for Big Ten football, even though if you meet me today, I’ll jokingly tell you that that was the reason. The first time I ever really started to feel old was when I–for the first time in my life–didn’t have a school to go back to last fall. To add insult to injury, I couldn’t even be in the same state for Michigan State’s home opener vs Boise State. 

That stunk. 

Because there’s something special about College Football, isn’t there? I’m not even talking about the play on the field, though that is special in its own right. No, I’m talking about the way that College Football serves as a special place in our puny little … Read More… →

If You Meet Your Father On The Road…(Hanky Alert)

By | | , ,
Comments Off on If You Meet Your Father On The Road…(Hanky Alert)
Robert Phillips

There is an old Buddhist proverb that goes something like this: if you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him. If you meet your father on the road, kill him.  I’m sure I got that wrong.  It’s been a long time since my “Eastern Religions” course in college.  The first part of the proverb reads like some vague comment a prophet might have screamed on a street corner, but that second part…kill my father?  I think I know what it means, or at least it has meaning for me which may in no way relate to its intended meaning, but as it turns out, I didn’t kill my Dad. Cancer did.

Dad3Read More… →

Five Minutes That Could Redefine How You Perceive Media

By | | , , , ,
2 Comments
Jeff Mahowski

If you have seen a movie, watched television, or even spoken of the two, then you’ve probably heard of Kevin Spacey. Our main man is attributed to being the degree by which people are separated in the film world, the “Six Degrees of Kevin Spacey”. Indeed Kevin Spacey’s prolific career that began in 1986 spans television, film, and music. He has had unparalleled success in pretty much everything he has done. Spacey’s most recent notable work includes his new hit series “House of Cards” on Netflix. Speaking in Edinburgh, Kevin Spacey, describes the process he and his team went through trying to get “House of Cards” greenlit, and in the process, ever so eloquently explains how the current model of delivering media content to the … Read More… →